Wednesday, January 28, 2009

LNO and a little more

I actually typed up a pretty lengthy post two nights ago but my aggravating loving husband accidentally contributed to it's unplanned deletion.

I had about four paragraphs and was actually doing one of my few and far between serious posts when he comes in from outside holding a pan full of charred ribs. His mother gave him a meat smoker for Christmas and it has become his new passion in life. He's always smoking something and while it helps out with the cooking, I'm starting to get a little tired of arriving at my destinations smelling like I just got off a long lunch-shift at Sonny's BBQ. So as I was finishing up my post he wanted me to look at the burnt mounds of what used to be ribs. I politely told asked him to please wait for one second while I finished up, but he overlooked my request and stuck one in my face, because he's understanding and patient like that. I, of course, being the graceful, calm, and collected person that I am frantically starting flailing my arms and pushed him away.

And that's when I looked down and noticed that every single word on my page had been deleted except for a single little 'a'. I hoped it had been previously saved but had no luck. I got a little frustrated and had no desire to retype it all. So, long story long, that's what happened.

My original post was on being faithful. Over the past couple weeks I've been really thinking about faithfulness and how I want my loved ones (especially Kate) to find me faithful. I want her to think of me as someone who loves the Lord with all my heart, soul, and mind. And not because I just tell her that I do, but because she sees it in me. Some people call it their legacy, as in what type of legacy do you want to leave behind? Thoughts like this have filled my head and heart lately.

It's been said that God speaks to us in echoes, like a repeated theme or topic that somehow keeps coming up. It'll be in your thoughts and then maybe you'll hear a song about, or it will come up again in a conversation with a friend, or a sermon may touch on it. That's happened to me recently. And then last Sunday our music leader sang Steve Green's "Find Us Faithful" during our morning service. It was the perfect song. The lyrics sum up every thought that's been running through my head lately.

Becoming a mother has changed me in ways I didn't really expect. I mean, I totally expected the unfortunate physical changes and even anticipated becoming more emotional (or maybe I should say hormonal?) but it's also made me start caring about the impact I have on others and whether it's positive or negative. To be completely honest, I'm not sure I ever thought of or cared what people would say about me after I was long gone, but now I think about it and realize that it IS important. I want Kate to be proud to have me as her mommy...and not just because I have a unique ability to make most nursery rhymes sound like 80's-style rap songs, or because I let her dump the entire bag of cereal all over the kitchen floor, but because I have a genuine love for the Lord that she sees through my daily living.

So here I am with this goal that seems kind of far away. I mean, I find myself going to God with the same ol' sins. "It's me again God... " And I know I fail miserably at always being faithful. But it is my desire that when I do lack faith, or when I am quick to make the entirely wrong decision, that Kate sees me handle it in prayer and seeking God's guidance. I want to be a living example for her to not only look up but also to learn from because I know that I'll always make mistakes, but it's how I handle them that she's going to be watching.

Rhonda, the host of LNO, talked about several topics last night. And while the majority of the topics are on parenting, I found myself learning about things I need to work on within myself just as much as with Kate. I cannot expect things from Kate before I expect them of myself.

She also spoke about dealing with hard situations (such as job loss, etc) with your children. Use those situations as opportunities for your children to see God at work. "Let's see what God's going to do!" We know that He is working all things for our good. We know it. We just need to believe, accept it, and live it already! Now that is good news! It goes back to having faith. Something I need to continually work on.

Rhonda is part of an online ministry and I found out last night that anyone who wants to tune in and listen to our LNO sessions online can do so just by going to the website! I'm running late this morning (when am I not?!) but will try to post the link today. I am so excited at the thought that some of you may join us next time!

Here's a few of my favorite lyrics from Find Us Faithful:

Let us run the race not only for the prize
But as those who've gone before us
Let us leave to those behind us
The heritage of faithfulness
Passed on through godly lives
Oh may all who come behind us find us faithful
May the fire of our devotion light their way
May the foootprints that we leave
Lead them to believe
And the lives we live inspire them to obey
Oh may all who come behind us find us faithful
After all our hopes and dreams have come and gone
And our children sift through all we've left behind
May the clues that they discover
And the memories they uncover
Become the light that leads them
To the road we each must find

Oh my all who come behind us find us faithful

Where's Waldo? Oh wait. That's me.

L to R: Jobeth, Abbi, Sal Gal, Rhonda, me, Tracey, Kerri


Two Little Lambs said...

What an inspirational post! It really made me think. Thanks for sharing.

Gwen said...

Such a great post!!! And I think I have the same navy/pink shirt from Old Navy. :)

hGb said...

Enjoyed this post. I heard it once described as the dash on your tombstone. birth - death I too am praying that my "dash" will be lived in a way that could only be accredited to the Lord.

Thanks for sharing!

sidenote: I have that shirt too but it looks way better on you!

Mrs. Hinson said...

This was a really great post! Josh and I had that song sung at our wedding by Mr. Kevin at the end when we were walking out! We still love it very much and feel to same way about our children and others finding us faithful.

Legallyblondemel said...

It is my friends who I have seen struggle & have been open about it that have been the greatest witnesses & inspiration to me and my faith. There is such grace in dealing with & seeing others address our flawed, messy, fragile yet stronger-than-we-think selves.

Oh, and that husband deletion thing has happened to me too - lovely - but not accompanied by smoker smells as of yet. Fun!

Brown Eyed Girl said...

What an uplifting post! You really hit home with so many great issues here. I love how inspiring and positive you are. This might be my go-to post whenever I need a little pick me up.

And how fun that we could all listen in to your LNO!!

Candice said...

What a great post Hollie. I know what you mean about God speaking to us through echoes. That's the way I usually feel God speak to me. I think that when I'm not "in tune" with Him, I don't always hear or see the echoes.

This was inspiring and encouraging to me. Thanks for taking the time to write it. And I can't wait to find out the link - I would love to listen!

Summer said...

I am right there with you girl. In fact just last night at small group we were talking about how we are making God real to our kids. It was an amazing discussion, and it really opened my eyes to some things.

One thing really stood out to me. We have to be intentional about our time. Intentional especially in our time with God.

That's something I really need to work on.

I adored this post!

Anonymous said...

I need you to write a post like that at least once a week. You really made me think about things! That was a GREAT post. WOW. It IS amazing how God speaks to us, isn't it?? Very inspiring post, thank you for writing that.

Mandy Rose said...

Great post! I often think of some of these same things...especially because I was not raised in a spiritual family. Just a few years ago is when I really started to see God's work and it can be amazing! Thanks for this inspirational post!

Paige's Petals said...

and....God just confirmed to me through you what he spoke to me about in my quiet time this morning. I myself was praying to have more faith. It is so hard to hand it to Him and then take it back. Rick Warren's daily email said the same thing. So, I am trying too. Legacy has also entered my thoughts this week. I am just finishing the book "One Month To Live"...what a great book that helps us to focus on what is important and how we would handle our lives if we had only 30 days to live.

Thanks for blessing me today, Hollie! xoxo

Lane said...

Thanks for sharing! Something that is really close to my heart right now.

Johnson Boys said...

How could your husband help in deleting a LNO post.. I love those things nad over a few burnt ribs. I so relate my husband smokes EVERYTHING.
I am so excited LNO is going to be on the web I cant wait I will see or listen in on the next one looking forward to the link
Thanks for sharing your take aways from those meetings really helps me keep the cant keep it together life in order.

Anonymous said...

Great post - thanks for being open.

And you poor thing - so sorry your post got deleted. I know how frustrating that can be!

Sweet Simplicity said...

Great post! It has me thinking about the things I want to get right in my life before having children. This has been on my mind a lot lately. It seems that God works even through blogger! :)

Sweet Simplicity said...

Great post! It has me thinking about the things I want to get right in my life before having children. This has been on my mind a lot lately. It seems that God works even through blogger! :)

Carolyn said...

I love it when I remember that what I do matters. Everything we do to ourselves, to others, despite others, because of others, all matters. I do my best to remind myself of that everyday. Thank you for the uplifting post, it's very well written Hollie!!

ASC said...

What a wonderful post...It is so funny because what you posted about God talking to us in echoes, idea of the "theme" being everywhere, rings so true to my heart. For me, it's the idea of finding faith that is my theme. Your blog helps me to continue of that path though it has proven to be difficult at times! Thank you so much!!

petrii said...

Beautiful post!!
Thank you for this.

Have a Blessed evening,

Joelle said...

love this post. good stuff. also, i have that shirt too... and my husband calls me charlie tuna in it.. :)

Puttin' On The GRITS said...

I'm going to BFE BLACKSHEAR, GA tomorrow. What kind of crap is that!?! great job i picked!

Kerri said...

Awesome Post...ohh what was I laughing at that no one else found funny?

April said...

Sooo needed to hear that. Especially the part about not being perfect. We always focus on our short comings. God works thru us in spite of our imperfections and the true testament of who we are is how we handle adversity! Thank you for making me realize that and the importance of my girls seeing me rely on God for everything!!

Les said...

Neat to see into your heart... thanks for sharing and reminding me of this. I get so busy that what really matters goes to the wayside- shouldn't be

Robyn said...

Thanks for the great post! I am dealing with a really difficult breakup right now and am so lucky to have a strong relationship with God to rely on during these trying times. As you said we know that he is working all things out for our good and we just have to really trust and believe he knows more than we do what is best for us. Thanks again, you are so beautiful both inside and out!